How Do You Attract A Woman Online? Find Your Survival Edge
Forget what you think you know about attraction. It’s not mental and it’s not even conscious. It is a deep evolutionary and biological need to find a strong mate.
Not strong in the muscular sense, though that is often an attractive trait (a good chest and shoulders go a long way, so hit the gym). By strong, I mean a mate that, in her subconscious mind, she can trust to provide healthy genes for healthy, attractive children who will be likely to mate well in the future.
This is the theory of the Selfish Gene as explained by scientist and author Richard Dawkins. Attraction might not be romantic or “modern” at all, but a desire implanted deep in a woman’s mind.
How does this apply to online dating? You must electrify her with your blend of strengths. In our modern context, this could be strength of wit (a flexible mind), strength of character (moral leadership), and strength of purpose (social leadership.)
All of these traits have to be demonstrated, because online she cannot feel your physical presence. She has photos, but that is a pale substitute for feeling how you stand, how you breathe, how you lean forward or twitch or scatter your focus.
Dawkins has a second fascinating theory about attraction in the human species – that one of the prime Strength Attractors is not musculature but intelligence. This, Darwin says, explains the explosive and unparalleled growth of the human cerebral functions. Throughout human evolutionary history, good female brains sought good male brains to mate with, since good brains make for excellent survival skills. So how can you be a magnet for attraction?
Project the kind of strengths described above. Even if you are not going to make babies together, and even if you’re looking just to date, she will subconsciously, irresistibly, powerfully be attracted to you if you embody and project robustness of health, confidence, brains – what adds up to what I call “survival smarts” or “Survival Attractors.” You already possess these, even if you are not fully aware of them.
This kind of strength creates trust. Trust is a main component of attraction. It is a kind of feral animal security that she needs in order to be intrigued and attracted to you. It is why women love firemen. There is a competence, a confidence as well as a deep service to the tribe – which creates a projection, real or not, that this particular male of the species can help her survive and pass on her seed in a safe, promising way.
Now, I am not a fireman, and most likely neither are you, but you already have elements of your personality and lifestyle that project survival competence and the survival edge. Finding your survival edge is the key to having women become and stay attracted to you.